Saturday, 3:45 AM

Maggie, Maggie, Maggie - We need to have a talk. I know how much you like to touch base with your father in the morning even though he leaves for work by 6AM (on weekdays). I know you like to crawl up in bed with me and watch him choose his clothes and direct him to wear a necktie although that's totally out of the norm at his office. But it's fun. I know how sad you are when you get up in the morning and he is already gone. I remember very clearly the sobbing and despair yesterday morning when you realized that you had missed him. In fact, that crying so moved me that I mentioned it to your loving dad.

He told me that the two of you had had a conversation the night before that went something like this:

Mags: "Papa, I like to wave goodbye to you when you leave for work, but sometimes I don't get to see you in the morning."

Jay: "Yes, Mags, I leave early. If you want to wave goodbye to me, you just have to get up before I leave..."

So, then you tried yesterday morning, and missed him. And cried. And apparently determined that you would not miss him again. (Needless to say that the implications for me are as follows: each morning you will now either get up earlier than any respectable four year old should OR you will oversleep and start the day crying because you've missed the chance to wave goodbye.) BUT, I digress - this morning (SATURDAY) at 3:45, I heard "pat pat pat pat pat" down the hallway. Then I heard the door to the darkened great room open and a little voice call out "Papa?"

When there was no answer I heard the door to our bedroom ease open. You focused in on the sleeping form of your father, took comfort in the fact that he was still in bed and went "pat pat pat pat pat" back to your room. That was two hours ago. You are now asleep. Your father is now asleep. I AM AWAKE. VERY AWAKE. AND LIKELY TO STAY THIS WAY FOR QUITE SOME TIME. We may have a problem here...